Choose Your Own Destiny
by Isis1
Summary: You choose which path you want to take. A bit of humor, a bit of romance, and just plain craziness. My first attempt at humor.


PAGE 1  
You lived in a nice place, had a nice little apartment,   
nobody really bothered you. Untill one night you're walking down   
the street, it's dark and has begun to drizzle. You hear footsteps.   
At first, you ignore them, but as you go faster, so do they.   
You run faster and faster. You see an alley way toward your   
right, you quickly dart in there. Your breathing is ragged.   
You don't even see it coming. The blaster being pulled out of   
its holster doesn't register in your mind. You hear something,   
like a buzzing kind of noise and then see nothing. You're   
thrown into a blackness.   
  
When you awake you're in a small room, lying on a couch.   
There is a tall mirror standing at the far end of the room.   
A door opens and an ugly, disgusting whipid pokes his head through the door.   
  
"Come on, you're on in one minute," he yells, walking over to you.   
  
He grabs your arm, roughly and drags you out the door.   
You try to protest, but he's too strong. You're drug through a   
long hallway and then before you know what is happening, you're   
thrown up to a stage. You stumble and then come to a stop. A   
bright light shines into your eyes. You squint and peer out   
toward the crowd. In the distance you notice, right away,   
a man dressed in battered light green armor. Before you   
get to ponder on the strange armor a whip snaps in the air.   
It then hits you in the back. A seering pain overcomes you.   
You fall to your knees.   
  
"Dance, slave!" yells a man, holding the whip that just hit you.   
  
IF YOU CHOOSE TO DANCE, GO TO PAGE 3  
IF YOU WANT TO JUMP OFF THE STAGE AND RUN TO THE MAN IN THE ARMOR, GO TO PAGE 6   
  
PAGE 2  
Maul growls at you and glares at you with his yellow,   
menacing eyes. You let out a whimper, which only makes him   
smile. He glides toward you, eyes boring holes through you.   
You want to look away, but find it impossible to do so.   
You blink once and in that time he has moven face to face   
with you. Your heart beats faster and faster. He pulls his   
lightsaber and ignights it. He trails the lightsaber over   
the traces of your body. It's too quickly for the untrained   
eye to see, but one flinch, one involuntary movement, you   
could be killed. You feel the warmness of the 'saber on your   
skin. He holds the lightsaber just a few inches from your throat.   
  
"Why are you doing this?" you ask in a whisper.   
  
In one simple answer, one people use as an excuse.   
  
"Because I can," Maul states.   
  
You barely feel it. A light sting, then nothingness.   
  
THE END  
  
PAGE 3  
  
It is silent in the audience all but a few mumurs. A slow tune begins.   
You stick your left hand out, in a pointing gesture. You start to sway your   
hips, slow and alluring. This causes a few shouts of excitement to rise out   
of the crowd. You slide your knees and lay back between them. You hear   
some awes at your flexability. Quickly, you bring your upper torso up,   
in a jerky movement. In one swift movement, you flip to your hands,   
holding all of your weight up, then as swiftly as before you come down   
into a split. The entire crowd errupts in cheers. The music stops   
and you climb to your feet. Some credits are thrown up on stage.   
You quickly pick them up and run back stage. The whipid from before   
takes hold of your arm and drags you back to the room you were in before.   
He practically throws you to the floor, luckily for you you have some balance.   
Before the whipid leaves, he yells over his shoulder,   
  
"Someone wants a word with you,"   
  
Your mind races. 'Who would want to speak to me?' you ask yourself.   
You walk to the mirror and stand, looking at yourself. You didn't notice before,   
but you're wearing a purple top that comes down to a v-shape. You also sport   
black, silk pants. 'Nice,' you think. Breaking into your thoughts, the door   
burst open.   
  
IF DARTH MAUL IS STANDING IN THE DOORWAY GO TO PAGE 2  
IF BOBA FETT IS STANDING IN THE DOORWAY GO TO PAGE 5  
IF YOUNG OBI-WAN KENOBI IS STANDING THERE, GO TO PAGE 4  
  
PAGE 4   
  
Obi-Wan stands up straight, his posture is perfect. His height   
astounds you. His blue eyes travel over your body, which makes you blush.   
You cast your eyes downward. He chuckles and holds out his hand. You enterlace   
your fingers with his and walk out of the room.   
  
As you reach the exit, two whipid guards, bigger than the one that treated   
you so badly, stand in your way. They hold their viro-blades.   
  
"You're Weki's new pet, you can not leave," one says angrily.   
  
Obi-Wan glances at you, then back at the two guards. He smiles. You can   
feel Obi-Wan's penetration of your mind. He asks, "What should I do?"   
  
IF YOU TELL OBI-WAN TO USE THE FORCE TO CONVINCE THEM TO MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, GO TO PAGE 7  
IF YOU TELL OBI-WAN TO CUT THE GUARDS DOWN, GO TO PAGE 9  
  
  
PAGE 5  
You rack your brain, trying to find out who it could it be. It then comes   
back to you, the pictures, the stories. Only one man wears armor like that...Boba   
Fett. You won't deny it, Boba Fett has always interested you, in fact you thought  
about becomming a bounty hunter. You always shook off the idea, though. His  
blaster is raised and aimed at your heart. He motions for you to get up. You   
slowly get up and inch your way toward Fett. As you get nearer, something seems   
familiar. You stop a foot away from him. He brings his blaster to your head.   
You close your eyes, thinking, 'Who could have placed a bounty on me?" he pulls   
the trigger. You expect to wake up with your brains splattered from hear to Hoth,   
but you feel the same. You look up to your smiling friend. She's almost crying   
from laughter. It was all a big joke. You punch her in the arm.   
  
"Oww, that really hurt," she complains, holding her sides.   
  
"Damn, stupid nurf dung, sith..." you mumble at her.   
  
As you two walk out of the dance club, it's amateur night. When you   
reach the outside, the sun is just barely rishing. A cool breeze hits your face.   
  
"You always said you wanted to dance for Fett," she offers.   
  
"Yeah, yeah, whatever," you say, rolling your eyes.   
  
'Well,' you think, 'sometimes dreams never do come true.'  
THE END   
  
PAGE 6  
In movement, quicker than one would expect from the way you look, you   
jump off the stage. You land on your feet in a crouch. You rush to the   
armored man and fall to your knees. His helmeted head looks down on you.   
You can't tell if he feels pity or disgust. You grab onto his right leg.   
He flinches from your touch.   
  
"Please," you whisper, the urgency in your voice is well noted.   
  
He kicks you off his leg, causing you to fall backward on your back.   
He raises his blaster and pulls the trigger. Your face is full of bewilderment.   
You fall back and your body becomes limp. The whipid from the back runs down the   
stairs, but stops just short of the armored man. His lips form the words that   
everyone is afraid to say, BOBA FETT.   
  
Fett walks to you and picks you up. He swings you over his shoulders,  
causing no more pain than it would to lift a feather. Fett walks out the door,   
no one tries to stop him.   
  
When you awake, your head begins to swim. Being knocked out twice within   
a few hours doesn't suit you. You can tell your on a ship, but where, you do not  
know. A door hisses open. You turn your head toward it and the armored man appears.   
  
"What'd you do to me?" you ask, sitting up and rubbing your head.   
  
He doesn't answer. You stare at him. 'Not bad looking, except for   
the helmet, that would have to go,' you think.   
  
"Not one for talking, huh?" you inquire.   
  
You think you hear some sort of noise from him. He walks toward you.   
You cut your eyes to the right. He's standing above now. You can hear his breathing,   
or maybe it's just yours, you can't tell anymore. All that runs through your mind is,   
'Scary, scary, scary, scary!!!' You always did think to slow, he places a cool cloth  
in your hand and quickly turns and walks away. You gulp and watch as he walks away.   
'Nice butt," you think, but then shake your head to rid the thoughts.   
  
Your mom always told you your curiosity would get you in trouble, boy was she  
right. After a few hours of sitting on the lumpy cot/bed, you decided to do some   
minor exploring. You went to a door and turned back to make sure, "he" wasn't there.   
The coast was clear. You pushed the button and the door slid open. Your mouth dropped   
open. There was so many weapons and bombs and stuff you couldn't have ever imagined.   
You didn't hear it, it was so quiet.   
  
Fett grabs your arm and throws you back. You loose your balance for a split  
second then gain control.   
  
"What'd you think you're doin'?" he asked, anger penetrating his voice.   
  
"Um, um, um," you stutter.   
  
"Stow it!" he yells.   
  
You gulp in fear. He walks to you and grabs your arm. He pulls you to the front   
of the ship and pushes down in the co-pilot's seat. You glare holes through his helmet,  
but he seems not to notice. Once again, you were wrong.   
  
"Glaring at me will do you no good," Fett states.   
  
You stick your tongue out at him and continued to glare, but not in his   
direction. A smile crosses Fett's face. Then, a beeping sound interrupts the   
silence.   
  
"Long time, no see," mumbles Fett.   
  
"Huh?" you ask.   
  
IF IT IS HAN SOLO, GO TO PAGE 10  
IF IT IS DENGAR AND MANAROO, GO TO PAGE 8  
  
PAGE 7  
Obi-Wan makes a slight movement with his hand and whispers something.   
The guards stand there and start whispering. The move backward to reveal Darth   
Vader. You gasp. Suddenly, Obi-Wan starts to change, from young to old. You're   
no longer by the exit of the room, it's a hangar.   
  
You look to your right. There sits Luke Skywalker, crying. All he can mumble is,   
  
"All I wanted was some power converters, all I wanted is power converters..."   
  
You slowly back away from Darth and Obi-Wan. You tip-toe backward and run   
into Chewie. He roars and throws a piece of C-3PO at you. You duck just in time.   
The piece flies over your head and knocks over a storm trooper then another and   
another and another. It circles the room(Xena's chakram style) and comes back   
to Chewie's grasp. You run on behind Chewie. Not looking where your were going,   
you run smack into Leia. Her big doughnuts knocking you on your ass. Han comes   
running out of the Millennium Falcon, knife and fork in hand. As he runs down   
the ramp after Leia, he trips over another part of C-3PO. He rolls and stops  
at Leia's feet.   
  
"Yummm, doughnuts, aghhhhhhhhhhhh," he drools.   
  
C-3PO's legs come walking out of the Falcon and tumble down the ramp.   
His legs are kicking in the air. Chewie runs over and picks him up, growling   
and roaring all the while. He throws C-3PO over his shoulders and the legs begin   
to kick him, in, ummm, places, yeah.   
  
Meanwhile, R2-D2 is shocking Luke, while Yoda is riding him round.   
Yoda is hitting R2 with his cane, yelling,   
  
"Hmm, faster, faster, patience, hmmmmmmm!!!"   
  
"Power converterssssssssssss!" screams Luke each time R2 shocks him.   
  
All of sudden C-3PX comes out of nowhere and starts shootin' up the place.   
C-3P0's head is tied to a staff that he's holding. All C-3PO can say is,   
  
"Oh, dear, oh dear,"   
  
You're making your way out of the hangar, when you run into something,   
yet again. You turn around and who else would it be....Darth Maul of course.   
You giggle with delight and when your nervous you get a little violent, so you   
accidentally punch him. He falls back and is knocked out. You bring your right   
pinky to the right corner of your mouth and say,   
  
"Ooops,"   
  
You drag Mauly by the ankles to the Millennium Falcon, each step you take   
his head is bumped by the ramp. Once your inside you close the door.   
  
In a den, not very far from here, Obi-Wan and Vader sit on a couch watching  
ballet. Vader is trying to drink a can of beer, but there's the whole helmet thing.   
Obi-Wan looks up at the clock. He sighs.   
  
"Come on Vader, I mean Anakin, Ice Skatings on," Obi-Wan says, reaching for the remote.   
  
Vader slaps Obi-Wan on the wrist. Obi-Wan draws back. The doorbell rings.   
  
"Finally, pizza!" he yells and jumps up, but he got up too fast and threw out his back.   
  
Obi-Wan lays on the floor, writhing in pain.   
  
"Va..Anakin, a little help here," he begs.   
  
Vader rolls his eyes(don't ask me how he does, he just does.) He opens   
the door to reveal Boba Fett. He's standing over a very dead pizza boy. His   
points his blaster at Vader. Vader runs away, screaming like a school girl   
and jumps under some covers. Fett strolls in like he owns the damn place and   
jacks the beer. He walks out, smiling to himself.   
  
Back in the Millennium Falcon, Chewie sits playing a game of Sabaac with   
Yoda. Chewie ends up winning, which royaly pisses of his Masterness. Yoda wacks   
Chewie over the head with his cane. Mr. Hairy jumps up and knocks over the board   
and runs crying to Han. He throws himself onto Han's lap, not bothering to remove   
Leia. Luke is in a corner levitating the left over parts of C-3PO. Chewie merged   
C-3PO, C-3PX, and R2-D2 all together. So, this new droid, called C-R2X, has wheels,   
two heads and three arms. Darth Maul runs out in some black boxers, screaming,   
  
"Help me, she's killing me, so tired of se..." he's cut off by the sound of a whip.   
  
"You, sex, now!" you demand.   
  
Maul starts to cry. You wrap the whip around his ankle and have to drag him  
back to the bed. All everyone hears an evil laughter,   
  
"Muahahahahahahahahahahah!!!! Ha!!!"   
  
THE END   
  
  
PAGE 8   
COMING SOON,  
HOPEFULLY  
  
  
PAGE 9  
COMING SOON  
  
PAGE 10  
COMING SOON  



End file.
